future's so bright?

This doesn't count as speaking aloud, right? Because my life is seemingly coming together all of the sudden and I really don't want to jinx it. As I finish my applications to PSU, picking up transcripts and letters of recommendation and getting ready to send everything in, I feel as though everything I've been brainstorming and fantasizing about over the past few months is finally materializing into something tangible.
I don't like theoretical plans and fantasies, probably because I'm too cynical (I prefer to call it "realistic"). I don't make resolutions that I know I'm not capable of going through with. I don't like imagining the future because it's almost guaranteed to not pan out the way I would like it to. The solid, the tangible, is what I strive for. And I may be approaching it.
I guess it's nice to be wrapping up my final year of college feeling like it wasn't wasted time or a torturous experience. When I started, I was anything but thrilled with the demographic of the U of A campus, and I let that negatively affect my experience as a whole. And I still resent the utter devaluation of the humanities at the school. But as I look at my experience in the English department as a whole, I'm nothing but happy with all I've learned and accomplished. I love learning, and I love what I'm doing, and that feels good. I also love what I want to do in the immediate future, but I'm not going to lie to myself and say that isn't likely to change.